Do you sometimes come across those people who seem to lead the perfect life? What am I talking about, of course you have. We all have. Different people have different ideas of what the perfect life looks like, but we have all had that longing to live that other person's life. It's so exciting! Or they have an amazing spouse. They can buy the new iPhone 5. They can create a masterpiece with just some glue, string and cardboard. Season tickets, new car, great family, millions of free air miles, fun circle of friends, or my personal favorite, they always seem to have such an intimate relationship with the Lord. Yeah, that's right. I put the ever so cliche spiritual aspect into this post. But I'm just trying to be honest.
I realized some time ago that I was never going to get everything in life that I wanted. I have my own gifts, things I excel in, but I also have imperfections and limitations. Heaven knows that perfect figure only lives in magazines. I'm curvy and I've come to terms with it. When it comes to money or politics, I can only fake intelligence for so long. I'm usually at least a few weeks behind the current news. I can read just fine, but I'm a horrible story teller. I easily get lost when I'm only a few blocks away from home. The only reason I know the sun sets in the West is because I love the beach so much. Things on the top shelf are pretty easy for me to reach, but it becomes awkward when me and my girlfriends want to take that "look at how hot our heels are" pic. I'm no degree of graceful. My complexion can never make up it's mind if it wants to imitate the little Mexican that's in me or the 3/4 of German. I love Christmas music all year round and Sound of Music is one of my favorite movies. If you were to ask my sisters I'm sure they could list off even more imperfections. But please, save me the embarrassment.
But in my short-lived adult life, I have looked longingly on that girl that seems to have it all together. She might not have the best home life. She might not be the prettiest in a group of people and she might not have acquired a doctorate by the time she was 25, but she loves the Lord. You can see it shining on her face every time she posts a picture on Facebook. You can soak up the wisdom from the enriching quotes she takes from her weekly reading. She has passion and desire to serve the Lord in every aspect of her life. She's spread thin from work, ministry, friends and family, but always has time to meet for some encouraging conversation over coffee. HOW DOES SHE DO IT??
I hope you didn't start reading this post hoping to find three steps to a more intimate relationship with the Lord. I don't have the answers! This is a blog about my road through life. This happens to be a rocky point that I'm still working through. I'm imperfect in my life and my faith. I struggle to be intimate with my Savior. I don't always see His hand working in my every day activities. I'm self-serving and impatient. Reading my Bible every day is a struggle. My prayer life can be stale and shallow. God gets crammed into a box with superficial expectations to His abilities. "This is how I want you to work in my life." "This is how I want you to bless me."
Are you asking yourself yet, why I have decided to post about my insecurities and weaknesses? Why not post something encouraging? Why not share how God has grown my faith in the last few weeks in the power of service? The answer is because I have been looked on as that girl who seems to have everything in order. It's easy to fake if you've been a Christian long enough. You have all the right responses tucked away in your pockets. You can string some spiritual words together to make a prayer sound genuine in a public setting. But I'm not perfect. Far from it. And I don't want people looking at my life with a false impression. Is God and His work still the most important thing in my life. Absolutely. Am I in danger of questioning my faith. Absolutely NOT. This is just me in it's rawest form. I don't want people just to see the rose colored aspects of my trip. Things have been amazing and faith building, but I still live with my flesh. It's a daily fight to live righteously and walk humbly with my God.
My hope for those who read this post is not to discourage, but to encourage. EVERYONE struggles in their own way. Even the girl who seems to have it all together with a perfect relationship with God. If you were to look close enough you would find those struggles and insecurities. But it's through those fights with the flesh and with sin that makes us who we are before our God. He gives us different strengths and weaknesses. But it's through the fight and struggle that we become more like our Father. We find our strength in His unending grace and His everlasting desire to forgive. If you are struggling today, discouraged that your life isn't all that you want it to be, know that there is another sister in Christ fighting and struggling as well. But the battle isn't lost. God wins in the end! And we have a cloud of witnesses to encourage and keep us fighting. Please, if you have extra time, look on the verses from Hebrews 12:1-2. It has been such an encouragement to me these last few days. And I'm sure you will gain the same encouragement as you gain strength from our Savior.
I realized some time ago that I was never going to get everything in life that I wanted. I have my own gifts, things I excel in, but I also have imperfections and limitations. Heaven knows that perfect figure only lives in magazines. I'm curvy and I've come to terms with it. When it comes to money or politics, I can only fake intelligence for so long. I'm usually at least a few weeks behind the current news. I can read just fine, but I'm a horrible story teller. I easily get lost when I'm only a few blocks away from home. The only reason I know the sun sets in the West is because I love the beach so much. Things on the top shelf are pretty easy for me to reach, but it becomes awkward when me and my girlfriends want to take that "look at how hot our heels are" pic. I'm no degree of graceful. My complexion can never make up it's mind if it wants to imitate the little Mexican that's in me or the 3/4 of German. I love Christmas music all year round and Sound of Music is one of my favorite movies. If you were to ask my sisters I'm sure they could list off even more imperfections. But please, save me the embarrassment.
But in my short-lived adult life, I have looked longingly on that girl that seems to have it all together. She might not have the best home life. She might not be the prettiest in a group of people and she might not have acquired a doctorate by the time she was 25, but she loves the Lord. You can see it shining on her face every time she posts a picture on Facebook. You can soak up the wisdom from the enriching quotes she takes from her weekly reading. She has passion and desire to serve the Lord in every aspect of her life. She's spread thin from work, ministry, friends and family, but always has time to meet for some encouraging conversation over coffee. HOW DOES SHE DO IT??
I hope you didn't start reading this post hoping to find three steps to a more intimate relationship with the Lord. I don't have the answers! This is a blog about my road through life. This happens to be a rocky point that I'm still working through. I'm imperfect in my life and my faith. I struggle to be intimate with my Savior. I don't always see His hand working in my every day activities. I'm self-serving and impatient. Reading my Bible every day is a struggle. My prayer life can be stale and shallow. God gets crammed into a box with superficial expectations to His abilities. "This is how I want you to work in my life." "This is how I want you to bless me."
Are you asking yourself yet, why I have decided to post about my insecurities and weaknesses? Why not post something encouraging? Why not share how God has grown my faith in the last few weeks in the power of service? The answer is because I have been looked on as that girl who seems to have everything in order. It's easy to fake if you've been a Christian long enough. You have all the right responses tucked away in your pockets. You can string some spiritual words together to make a prayer sound genuine in a public setting. But I'm not perfect. Far from it. And I don't want people looking at my life with a false impression. Is God and His work still the most important thing in my life. Absolutely. Am I in danger of questioning my faith. Absolutely NOT. This is just me in it's rawest form. I don't want people just to see the rose colored aspects of my trip. Things have been amazing and faith building, but I still live with my flesh. It's a daily fight to live righteously and walk humbly with my God.
My hope for those who read this post is not to discourage, but to encourage. EVERYONE struggles in their own way. Even the girl who seems to have it all together with a perfect relationship with God. If you were to look close enough you would find those struggles and insecurities. But it's through those fights with the flesh and with sin that makes us who we are before our God. He gives us different strengths and weaknesses. But it's through the fight and struggle that we become more like our Father. We find our strength in His unending grace and His everlasting desire to forgive. If you are struggling today, discouraged that your life isn't all that you want it to be, know that there is another sister in Christ fighting and struggling as well. But the battle isn't lost. God wins in the end! And we have a cloud of witnesses to encourage and keep us fighting. Please, if you have extra time, look on the verses from Hebrews 12:1-2. It has been such an encouragement to me these last few days. And I'm sure you will gain the same encouragement as you gain strength from our Savior.
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